I...really like this. I know how you feel. God's been all I've had to cling to, the only One who's listened to the things I have to say, the only thing keeping me alive right now. I recently lost my boyfriend. We both agreed the best thing to do was break up. But it hurt so much. All we could do was fight. No matter what I said, it got him angry. Even after we broke up, this irrational behaviour continued. Finally, I wrote him a letter. Basically, it said, "I can't seem to do anything but bother you anymore. I'm sorry. I won't bother you any more. If you want to talk, I'll wait to hear from you. I won't try to reach you. I'll still be praying for you. You've been a wonderful friend, brother, and more. Goodbye." That was over two weeks ago. i've not heard anything from him since, let alone seen his face. It hurts so much. I'm so glad God is the best and truest love I'll ever have. I know it hurts so incredibly much. But, with Him holding me, I don't see things as being as hopeless or terrible as i would if I didn't know Him. I'll pray for you, ok?
you have my prayers and hopes for a better tomorrow and happy times once again.
In Christ,
Rachael

--
It IS possible to be happy and sad at the same time. I know. I am.

thank you so much, its been 3 weeks sinc she left me, for no reason, jsut decided over night that she didnt love me anymore I havent done anything wrong and it hgurts so much, wanted to kill myself, had my minister phoning me everyday to see if I'm ok, my youth worker come down to take me out, but nothing works. I went out with a counsellor yesterday and I walked straight past her...really worked, made me worse.

Straight after she dumped me my grandma died, the other got diabetes, and then we had to arrange the funeral, i knew these were gonna happen soon, but she always sed she be there to get me thorough it, and coz she werent, it just made it that worse, my families breaking down, and without her there I am breaking down with em...but worse...

I just waiting, hoping, praying that she will be here in my room one day when I get home, or ring me suddenly one day, or add me to msnagain....i dunno...anything...

--
...the silence gets us nowhere...

Wow. My grandma recently died, too. yikes. I KNOW how you're feeling. You see, she died a few months ago, and my mother's been in a sort of depression ever since. My sibblings seem untouched now that it's been a while. We didn't even get to say goodbye because she fell out of her bed in the middle of the night. I didn't even get to see her until the funeral. she was so pretty, but I felt so weak. Luckily, my ex wasn't my ex yet. He went with me to her house the day she died. And he came to the funeral and the wake. I was so blessed by his tenderness. But, the thing is, that was the most my family had seen him since we started dating EIGHT months earlier! So, yeah. While i know I was deeply important to him, ... i just don't think he could see me as him future wife and persue me like that. i was just a close sister to him. someone to talk to. Which was very good. But, it's been about four months since we broke up. and i still struggle to choke-back the tears when someone talks to me about him. You see, i'm a close friend with his little sister. Just last night she and I went with a bunch of other people to go swing dancing. So, I see her quite a bit. He's such a sweet guy, too. I know he's so amazing, and the person he finally decides to be committed to will be the happiest girl in the world. I just wish that was me...

i will keep praying for you, if you don't mind, that is. i hope things DONT get easier, but that you'll be able to see God's face through it all. And that this will strengthen your ministry. Thank you so much for writing about this online. Keep in touch, ok? I'd like to keep tabs on you.... And I'll pray that things will look up as soon as possible.

Through God's grace and my Father's true Love,
Rachael

--
It IS possible to be happy and sad at the same time. I know. I am.

thanks for your support, hopefully i will get what i want if i stay strong and look to my saviour

god bless

--
...the silence gets us nowhere...